New Waterford Girl - JUMP O, Brother Where Art Thou - JUMP The Patriot - JUMP The Perfect Storm - JUMP Planet of the Apes - JUMP
Proof of Life - JUMP Quills - JUMP
The Replacements - JUMP Return to Me - JUMP Riding In Cars With Boys - JUMP Road Trip - JUMP Romeo Must Die - JUMP Rules of Engagement -
JUMP Rush Hour 2 - JUMP
Directed by Allan Moyle
starring Liane Balaban, Tara Spencer-Nairn, Andrew McCarthy
Please remember that as much as you need to fall for these girls, they
are just girls.
On IMDb
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Simply
put this movie makes you need to love the characters. Well, not all of
them, for me it was just two of them. It also makes you wonder
if you were ever right when you thought of your life growing up as the
weirdest and obscenely difficult one possible. Life in New
Waterford doesn't really appear to have anything to offer you when you
are watching it happen on the screen, but you know at the end of the
movie, in spite of the horridity (new word, cool, do i get an award?)
of the place they live you really have begun to understand why a
person might have trouble ever leaving.
This is mostly a movie that is a story of a sliding
door, measuring the trials of one girl who is trying as hard as she
possibly can to exit her home town stage right and of another who is
moving into the town and slide into the sense of community that she
finds there. They become unlikely friends and conspiracy mates
and make the movie a joy to watch.
All of the characters in this film are tremendously
well written, and every thing about this film is character driven (i
love movies that are character driven). And the actors do some
really good work at making these characters real. Both of the
leads, Balaban and Spencer-Nairn are really quite formidable and
incredible. As i mentioned you may have trouble not falling in
love with them. The story is cute, fresh and darling, you will fall
for it. The imagery and photography is incredible for how much
it makes you love your own town (sorry G).
So as you can tell, i liked it. An engaging
story with delightful characters and it was just a joy to
behold. Oh, i didn't mention that we laughed, hard, quite often
through this movie. It is very funny, but that is not what it is
about. But you will laugh. I have given it a half-limpid.
Directed by Joel Coen
starring George Clooney, John Turturro, Tim Blake Nelson
Not only would Homer go to this, he'd even buy his own ticket.
On IMDb
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Wow! That's what i
found myself thinking time after time as i watched this film.
The brother's Coen have done it again. They have made a movie
that i sat, had to sit and be absorbed by. I literally had no choice
but to get sucked in heart mind and soul. This movie,
according to the trailers is based upon the Odyssey by Homer.
You know the one, epic Greek poem. Well apparently the brother's
knew just as much about it as you do. Meaning that they haven't
read it but they have heard some of the stories. And this is
what they used in this movie. They took parts of the Odyssey and
incorporated them into their movie.
A movie that managed to fit just fine around them.
This is a road movie like no other. I swear these prison
escapees manage to run for half the movie and never get more than 20
miles from the prison. but you don't care, they could have run
in spot and you wouldn't care.
How about the biggest shocker of all. Clooney does
a job far above what i would have considered for him. He had a
lot of funny lines that were not to be said funny that needed just the
right tone and timing and he nailed it each and ever time. He
made you laugh. Seriously if your mother had just died and your
dog just pissed on the supermodel who had just agreed to date you you
would still smile.
The story and dialogue in this movie were exceptionally
clever. The acting perfect. The sets were great and
grand. It was the depression in this movie and you knew it
without doubt. And the music...the music is what tied this film
together. Not that it needed it really so i guess i should say
rather that the music was the icing on the cake. Or the ice in
the scotch, not necessary really but sure is nice to have.
I truly loved this film. A pick me up at any time.
Fun at any price. You need to see this film. I have given it a half-turgid.
Directed by Roland Emmerich
starring Mel Gibson, Heath Ledger, Tchéky Karyo
Good ole American know-how makes a movie all about American
Greatness. Surprised?
On IMDb
Official Site
American-centric.
This movie? Yes. Yes of course. What would you
expect from a movie called the Patriot about the American
Revolution? After you accept that the victors always rewrite
history in their favour and especially when they are going to be
making it into a movie that is intended to sell to those same people
it is a rather good movie.
This movie is of course set in the American
Revolution. Not the parts that we always hear about way up on
the North with George Washington but down in the South. It shows
a semi-historical depiction of a rebel put in charge of the militia,
called 'The Ghost.' He is in charge of delaying the march of the
English General Cornwalliss. He does a good job. He
infuriates the British and does a stand up job. The British,
were nowhere near this evil, just in case you were wondering.
The acting...passable. Not too bad, not to
great. The story, gripping and amusing. The action, well
done. Although...how the hell could the ever get that good at shooting
muskets? You tell me....impossible. The dialogue, as good
as the acting actually, they sort of worked arm in arm. The sentimental
parts, to me where kind of silly and forced.
This may not sound that good, but this movie held my
attention and kept me entertained, even if it was thoughts of
wondering if they were changing history again. i have given it a
half-limpidbecause of how much i enjoyed watching it.
Directed by Wolfgang Peterson
starring George Clooney, Mark Wahlberg, Diane Lane
Well, the water was pretty.
On IMDb
Official Site
Getting to know
you, getting to know all about you. Things i never thought i
would want to be able to sing about a storm. But here we are,
the most important, and practically only character of any importance
in this movie was the storm. And you know what, i still don't
think that a story about a bunch of wind and rain is a reason to enter
the theatre. I didn't think it was the case when Twister
came out, i was right then and i am right now. I mean, to be
fair, if they came out with a movie about weather that actually had a
story about characters that i could give a shit about, then we might
have room to talk.
The plot, betcha i can do it in 20 words. Let's
give it a go. Really big storm, fishermen who need money and
have too few brains brave it. That would be 14 words, that is
the entire movie. They try to get us to buy into the characters
and care, but they fail miserably. I was hoping at one point
that the people back on shore would maybe go for a swim during the
storm, just to stop me from having to see them. Perhaps i am
being a little harsh, but perhaps they should have made a better
movie.
Right, in each review i try to put something redeeming about
a movie. Ummm, it had an ending? Ok, ok, that is a little
too much, this movie had well crafted action sequences i think, for
the most part (we don't need to talk about JAWS right now do we?) and
the effects weren't too bad.
Ok. Are you a fisherman? Are you a
sailor? Weatherman? George Clooney Droolite? Then
maybe, maybe, if you are so bored you can't get anywhere worse, go to
this. Otherwise....stay home and clean the toilet. i have
given this movie a vapid.
Directed by Tim Burton
starring Mark Wahlberg, Tim Roth, Helena Bonham Carter
Yeah, i'd kiss that ape, what of it?
On IMDb
Official Site
What if apes ruled
the world? This question had already been answered more than 30
years ago by a classic 'B' movie of the same name. Why did we
need a remake that had been 'reimagined' to return us to this
question? The answer is simple my friends, it is a story that
needs to be told over and over again. Ok, ok, this isn't true,
what do i care what the world would be like if it was ruled by the
apes and humans were the slaves. Not too much, thoughts to be
had on a sunday afternoon perhaps.
Why then?
Because we have moved on in technology, effects and makeup. And we all
know that remaking a movie cuts out most of the script searching,
development and name recognition. And in this case, there even
lay the possibility that they might do a good enough job that it would
be worth watching. They did this, amazingly enough, they made it
worth my time with some to spare.
This movie is a
good ape ruling the world movie. It is. The action is
intense, the apes are incredible, the acting, is, better than your
average sci-fi/adventure fare. I tell you one thing about the
story, it creates more plot holes than you care to count as it
progresses, but get this, it cleans them up as you move forward.
Again and again i found things that had annoyed me being explained in
a way later on that made sense and taught me that i should be just
slightly more forgiving. So the story could use a little
work, this is true, but it was good enough to allow me to enjoy the
movie.
The story is almost the same as the
classic. Man in spaceship gets stranded in time, planet he lands
on is controlled by apes and humans are the slaves, man attempts to
free humans while teaching lessons in equality and freedom, audience
thinks on deep subjects, ooh and ahh over effects and action and then
goes home happy. Hollywood at its shallowest, to be sure, but
that is what it does well. The details of the story are
interestingly different though and it is worth seeing this film if you
are a fan of the original.
I would reccommend this
movie to anyone looking for the action/adventure movie of the
summer. I will even go and see the sequal because if they don't
give me something to explain that dumb-ass last 5 minutes, i am going
have some heads rolling. I have given this movie a half-limpid.
Directed by Taylor Hackford
starring Meg Ryan, Russell Crowe, David Morse
So, you going to accept that job in South America now?
On IMDb
Official Site
Is it unfair to
say that before i even saw David Morse kidnapped in this picture that
i was kind of hoping that it would be happening? I guess it
would me more fair to say that i could sit there in my smugness
knowing that it couldn't be long before i saw it happen to him. It
wasn't that he was doing a bad job or anything, in fact i would
suggest that the level of my annoyance at him was rather more related
to the fact that he was always intended to be one of those people you
wouldn't like. And with this in mind one would have to suggest
that he was doing a good job. And, in spite of this haphazard
beginning, he did begin to win me over through his tense stay in
captivity.
As for Meg Ryan and Russell Crowe, well,
yeah, they were there in this movie. I would have expected
rather more from them in this film i think though. A friend i
was at this movie with complained about the almost complete lack of
action until right at the end. And he was correct, i guess, in
that there wasn't much action that occurred. And this is where
Meg and Russell became that much more critical, they had to carry it
with their charisma, atmosphere and in fact, acting. It is
my belief that there was enough movie and story here for them to
keep me fascinated, but you know they just didn't carry it
off. In the end they did an acceptable job and i can't really
complain too much but with just a bit better performance on both of
their parts i would have been rating this movie much higher.
From what i just said one could easily assume that i was saying that
this was a good story, well written and well done. And this
would be a fair assumption, this wasn't poorly done, it just needed
more from the performers.
In the end i stayed
awake, and interested. Mostly because it was an interesting
story that was more than a little tense and kept you on the edge of
your seat. And as someone who is planning on travelling to
places not unlike these in his future life, of great
import. Rent it, watch it, eat cheaper popcorn. I
have given this movie a tepid.
Directed by Philip Kaufman
starring Geoffrey Rush, Kate Winslett, Michael Caine
Try a little madness for a while.
On IMDb
Official Site
Just how much sympathy can
you actually have for the Marquis de Sade. Actually in all
reality i find that i have the ability for a great amount of pity and
empathy for him. Which is not to say that i would be into most
of the things that he was into, but to my recollections he only did
his sick and twisted things to people who wanted to be there.
Well, in the loosest sense of the word, i mean if you were willing to
be beat for money it might not be totally your own will and desire
that gets you there as much as your situation but what can you do
about that? Aside from the fact that he had a very sordid
personal life, which had no bearing on his arrests and
imprisonment. It was the fact that he was writing things that
were considered so obscene that they were subversive that had him
imprisoned.
It was a function of his rank and the
rank of his wife that kept the marquis alive and imprisoned in a sanatorium.
Which brings us to the start of this story. I think that many of
the people viewing this movie would agree that he did, indeed belong
there. For if there was one thing that Geoffrey Rush managed to
convey to us in this movie it was that the Marquis was an unstable
man. What wasn't made clear perhaps was whether it was something
he was born with, received as a side effect of his imprisonment or if
it came from not being able to write and distribute his work
freely.
One thing i am quite willing to
admit freely is that Rush does a wonderful job of his depiction. If
there is one thing he seems to be able to get his mind and skills
around it is acting the part of the insane. I can't say he is a
charmer but he definitely was one to draw you into his world and make
you a part of it. I don't know that i could say that for any of
the other starts of this movie. I will admit that i have a soft spot
for Kate Winslett with her smiling eyes and mischievous grin but i am
incapable of admitting that this crosses over into an instant
acceptance of her acting. In this i would say that she doesn't draw
from the movie and perhaps even adds to it, if only in the manner that
i find that she was believable and intriguing in her joy over the
nastiness the Marquis wrote.
Pheonix and
Caine both did almost less than nothing for me. In fact i would
almost say that Caine pulled away from my enjoyment. But
he is often capable of this act just be speaking with his all too
annoying accent. This said, this was an engrossing story that
not only kept my interest but pulled me along with it for the
ride. The insane characters and napoleon were also a
delight. In the end i gave this a limpid and
i recommend seeing it.
Directed by Howard Deutch
starring Gene Hackman, Keanu Reeves
Try ignoring the lead and it's not so bad? Is that a good thing?
On IMDb
Official Site
The problem with all movies that star Keanu Reeves is that eventually
you are going to have to see him on screen and then you are going to
have to see him on screen over and over again. But i have a
special trick that i developed one afternoon in the summer of
1995. I was hanging out in Victoria waiting for my friend to
finish work and decided to go to a movie, and being the masochist that
i am i went to see, A
Walk in the Clouds. I know, i know, just setting myself up
for punishment, wasn't i? But soon into it, as a method of
saving my sanity i developed this little trick. Every word that
was said by Keanu, i imagined it was being read by a K-mart salesman
that i grabbed in the magazine section to help me read a scene from a
script that i had found. So you know, he isn't really in the
scene, but if you don't get the lines out there, things won't make
sense anymore. Once this is done, if successful, the movie can
be judged on the other merits it may or may not have. I promise,
if you can do that for A Walk in the Clouds, it is actually not half
bad. And since that day, i have managed to stomach my way
through more of his movies in this same way, he isn't an actor in my
movie, they just nabbed him at K-mart because they were in a
bind.
Right, so once we get past the K-mart factor in this film, guess what,
it isn't half bad. It isn't half good either but it isn't crap.
The rest of the characters on the team are at least a bit funny and
Gene Hackman impresses, but he always impresses me. Sure sure,
it is formulaic and silly, but there are some creative bits in it and
they make it a bit better for us. I say, if you are one who is
going to like a sports movie that you are likely going to like this
one. The premise worked for me and the sports part of the story
did keep me going and i did feel some sort of cheering working its way
up through my self towards the end.
Ok, there were a couple of bad bits, like the romance. Puhlease,
even my K-mart factor system can't beat that. So in the end i
have given it a half-tepid.
Directed by Bonnie Hunt
starring Minnie Driver, David Duchovny, Carroll O'Connor,
and the list goes on
Looking for a sickly sweet romantic comedy? Well this one won't
come through, sweet, sure, but hilarious to boot.
-
On IMDb
-
Official Site
Start the movie with a gag bag.
That is my first recommendation. As my movie buddie says the
amount of smarmy sweetness is almost sickening in the first
while. Other than the gut turning perfection of Duchovny's life
and marriage, it is fine. As soon as the requisite death happens
(it's not like he was going to have an affair with Minnie.)
Then things get good. A little death is obviously what the
doctor ordered. This movie is funny. It is also sweet and
endearing, it will require you to reach over and hold the hand of your
partner, you really won't have a choice, so make sure you get napkins
so you can wipe your hand first. I guess i liked that about
it.
David Duchovy didn't at any point make me wonder where the conspiracy
was going to come from. I really didn't. He managed quite
successfully managed to make me believe that he was not an ex-FBI
agent. Minnie...well she just does sweet well when she wants
to. Why do you think i know so many women who hate her?
Why is she called whiney and horrible? Maybe for the same reason
that so many men hate Brad Pit, jealousy and the notion that this
might be the type of person that their mate could not only have an
affair with but leave her for forever.... Just my thought.
Carroll O'Connor, Robert Loggia and the other old boys were so cute
and adorable...they made me laugh every time they were onscreen.
Good job.
You know...it made me happy. I guess it was all set up to make
me fairly wistful for a relationship or true love, but in the end i
just felt like they deserved to find each other. Not bad
response from a movie when you think about it.
So, if you can handle sweet, sappy and lovely...go see it. As
these types of movies go, and as all movies go, i give it a half
turgid.
Directed by Penny Marshall
starring Drew Barrymore, Sara Gilbert, James Woods
Who knew that Drew actually had enough skill to transcend her annoyance
factors.
On IMDb
Official Site
This movie had one
huge hurdle to overcome for me to like it. An immense one really.
I can't remember the last time that Drew Barrymore didn't annoy the hell
out of me. I mean it, she drives me batty with how much i want to
smack her in the head. This movie, well it just wasn't the same.
This movie, and practically every thing about it impressed me.
The story is a simple one. It is a series of flashbacks told by
the sun that Drew has in the 60's at the age of in a very conservative
community. Being a very bright young lady with a future filled
with potential, we get to watch as her future is mangled at every turn
by the child that she has had.
The very best thing
about this movie wasn't, in fact Drew, it was the children actors that
they found. First the girl that they found, Mika Boorem was
incredible and the two different boys that played her sons (Cody and
Logan Arens - the same boy played by brothers, go figure) were as cute
and adorable as you could hope for.
Drew herself managed to make this movie a joy for me. Pay
close attention to the face of Drew whenever she is trying to
communicate with her son without words. I don't know what it is
about her at those times but instead of being a vacuous freak, she
becomes a woman with a depth and character that i have never seen
evident within her before. In fact, she reminds me at those times
of a friend that has the ability to leave me endlessly fascinated with
merely a look.
I will admit that the movie is sappy.
I will also admit that when my good friend turned to me in the last
moments and asked me if i was crying it would have been possible for it
to happen. There is much in this movie that is very touching and
real. I have no doubt as i watch it that it not only could be but
is a real story. I have given it a
limpid.
Directed by Todd Phillips
starring Breckin Meyer, Sean William Scott, Amy
Smart
Sex,
and toilet humour, and sex, and a whole bunch of unexpected smiles.
-
On IMDb
-
Official Site
So, one might expect this
movie to be unwatchable. One might thing that anything produced
by the imagination of Tom Green can't really be worth it. One
would normally be willing to correct i think. And yet, this
movie was different, this movie was better than i ever expected it to
be.
Everything you thought about it was pretty
much true. It is, a movie about a bunch of college boys
going on a road trip, sex, booze and foul play are pretty much the
entire point of it. And there is more nudity than i have seen a
mainstream movie in quite a while. There is more than its fair
share of off colour humour and stupid toilet jokes. The thing
is, for the most part, they are funny. They made me laugh, they
made me laugh a lot. They weren't so bad that i was cringing with
guilt at finding them funny, or even not finding them funny.
Tom
Green, well, he didn't make me want to run away and claim that i was
Nigerian instead of Canadian as i am. He, was personable and
played his character as i think that it should have been played.
So,
this movie didn't offend me, didn't make me ill, didn't make me want
to leave the theatre. And i laughed, and i laughed a lot, hard.
I give it a tepid.
Directed by Andrzej Bartkowiak
starring Jet Li, Don Cheadle, Isaiah Washington, Aaliyah, Delroy
Lindo
A
lot of fun if you like this sort of thing.
-
On IMDb
-
Official Site
Right. Before you do
anything else with this movie. Ask yourself if you are the type
of person who would want to walk into a martial arts, high on plot,
low on character, action movie and walk out having liked it.
Maybe i am a little bit jaded by this. I mean i watched it as a
denizen of the movie it was shot in. Every single scene in this movie
except for one scene that was stock footage from San Fran was of
somewhere i recognized. A good portion were from right beside my
work. I just couldn't stop from getting a huge kick out of this
fact. i had no choice.
The movie itself? It had amazing fight scenes. The fights
were surreal and matrix-like. The plot, well, it was believable
and at least slightly different if not imaginative or
creative. As a love story? If there was any love
going on, i don't know where the hell it was. It was moderately
invisible if anything. I am not certain yet if they were
supposed to be in love or not.
Listen carefully, if you yawn, you will miss the one time that the
word Romeo is mentioned in this movie.
But, the car chases were good, the gun fights were fast and furious
and the fight scenes made me ache for more.
Ignore the critics that don't know what to say. Ignore the
critics that whine that SF doesn't have mountains in the
background. Go for and enjoy the shear violence of it all.
I give this movie a tepid
but it might deserve another quarter point.
Directed by William Friedkin
starring Tommy Lee Jones, Samuel L. Jackson.
A defense of American military values....and yet interesting.
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On IMDb
-
Official Site
I was
impressed. I wasn't annoyed to the point of wanting to retch by
this movie. Does that sound enough like a resounding go and see
this for you? But really. I liked this movie. I went
in expected that i was going to be annoyed by the level of 'hey, we
are American, everything we do is correct' ness of this movie.
But it wasn't in your face like that. It attempted to attack
this issue with a certain level of thought and decorum.
It was even moderately well done. Of
course it's rating would indicate that they did not do an incredible
job. But they did do a credible job. And i enjoyed the
film. I might have enjoyed it a little bit more if it weren't
for the two morons behind me with the 1200 decibel whisper that, i am
sure could barely understand how the ticket purchasing procedure,
based upon how they had to discuss and establish the barest and merest
of facts in the movie.
There were some holes, there was perhaps a
little bit too much blind acceptance of US military doctrine but i
managed to swerve aside from that.
Tommy Lee did a great job. I even
believed his limp. Sam....well, i have seen better but he did
not do a bad job. I was about to say that Bruce Greenwood did
not do that good of a job, but you know, i still harbour a little ill
will towards him, so he must have made an impression. Kudo's to
Blair Underwood for being in the movie for over half of of it and my
not even noticing that i should be recognizing him.
Very interesting usage of blood splattering in
the combat scenes...this by way of warning of some goriness.
I liked it. If you like military or
courtroom dramas...maybe you should give it a try. I give it a tepid.
Directed by Brett Ratner
starring Jackie Chan, Chris Tucker
If the women hadn't been so beautiful, i think this would have been an
unpardonable waste of my time.
On IMDb
Official Site
Of course we
knew it was going to be bad before we went to see it, you had to know,
the first one was bad, how could this one be better? But i still
went to see it, for a number of reasons. One it was bad movie Friday,
anything is forgivable on bad movie Friday. Two, i like Jackie
Chan movies, he always deserves a second chance. Three, my
loyalty to my wonderful readers. Well, let's just say i took on
in the gut here.
This so wasn't a good
movie. What didn't suck about it? The dialogue was juvenile
and trite, the story was see through and boring, the action was far
below Chan standard, the humour was, well, absent, and i am still not
sure if there were any characters in it to be developed.
I can't think of any sort of good reason to recommend this movie to
you. Oh wait, there are two incredible beauties in it, if you
are into that sort of thing. Strong, wonderful characters, with
bad lines and parts, but strong actresses.
The story line....if you can call it a line and not just
a blob, goes something like this; Tucker is on vacation in Hong Kong,
they discover some sort of smuggling ring and get on the case.
It takes them to, of all places, Vegas.
The best
word for this film is crap. The best rating is vapid.
