so my first thought is just to talk of other things.
to go on about my life as if you want to know about what is going on in it.

   i could talk about how i am heading to Calgary this weekend.  i am driving with my parents, a rather interesting 12 hours in the car i would predict.
   i could talk about my getting to meet my new niece, something i am more than a little excited sometimes and rather blah at others.
   i could talk about going back to the city that i have not been back to since i was last there and spent a rather wonderful weekend with Andrea...you remember Andrea of course.  There's going to have to be a feeling or two there i think. But all things get resolved don't they?
   i could talk about how last night, for the first time, since mid-December i sat down and wrote. i mean really wrote.  i start and finished the article.  And the best part, since it is all about what i call my favourite possession, i can't even remotely figure out where i would get it published, and never could.  So, i wrote it for me.  Writing again is like a great weight lifted off of my shoulders. i love this.
   i could talk about how much i loved my Oscar party.  Note i did not say, how much i loved the Oscars themselves.  i am, after all, relatively undecided as to whether anything but what they women wear is important at all. i mean they could all sing their acceptance speeches and it would only matter if their shoes didn't match their gowns.
   i could talk about the trouble in the Falklands...but really...this isn't what you want to hear about is it...you want to hear about me and the girl.

  i still have trouble believing it is over. it was only a month, no, more than a month but not much.  we only saw each other, as a couple once.  i don't know what it was though, i felt connected, i felt close, i felt happy.  how could any of these things be wrong?

   so yeah. we broke up.  I think i said in the last entry that it was I, but that's simply not true, it was a discussion between the both of us and in the end we decided that us, as a couple, just didn't make sense.  Not right now, not as things go.  It's not the distance, it's busy-ness that both of our lives currently exhibit.  There just isn't time for each other.
  And without time for each other, how can we even have a relationship?  Maybe if we were in the same town we could make the time here and there but as it is, we just can't.  It just can't be done right now.
   So where does that leave me? Sad. 
   Where does that leave us?  Well, as i told you before we started out in this thing as friends and there we remain.  So we are still talking.  And that, my friends is like a tight rope.  Can you talk about this, can you not talk about that...etc...etc...etc...

   Ok, i'm tired. i'm very tired. i have to pack for that trip that i didn't talk about.  i know there was other stuff in that list of letters that you might want to hear about, but i can't do it tonight. sorry.