Hi there.  I may have promised to come and tell you about this earlier this week but i didn't make it.  Sorry. 

   So i think i mentioned that i was interested in someone and was attempting to ask them out.  I put some time into it, got to know her well enough to know that i liked her. Flirted, played, enjoyed myself. 
   Then i tried to ask her out.  I tried.  And tried.  And tried.  One thing is for sure, i sure suck at trying to ask someone out.  It's not the asking, i am sure if i could open my mouth that some approximation of the right words would have come out.  But they would not.
   But i did, i did ask her out.  On monday.  I had told myself that after two weeks of attempting to ask her out and failing miserably that rather than go through the rest of my life without having asked her out, i could or would or perhaps even should ask her in the one way that i am actually capable.
   You know, it sometimes amazes me that something that i can not do in person i can do via email. So monday i said that if i was not going to use my voice i would use my fingers.  And i did.  I will not lie to you, i was shivering as i pressed the send button but even though it was hard i could still do it.

   Well, long story short.  She's seeing someone.  I had no clue.  I was watching for signs all along but they weren't there.  Even worse, even though i thought she was flirting with me all along, and while i guess she might have been, my asking her if she would like to go out with me hit her has a huge surprise. 
   Maybe i'm subtle.  Who knew?

   Anyways, while i was doing all this i was having some other thoughts.  Thoughts like, 'why does everyone use dating to get to know someone and i seem to only consider dating someone that i am willing to believe that i am going to like?' and 'what is it about me that doesn't consider someone important enough to work up the nerve to ask out unless i know they are worth it?'  or 'what kind of freak am i that i consider my time so important that i won't play games, making up to someone i don't know and don't know anything about.'  
   Why can't i get it through my head that in order to meet someone and like them i have to meet them and get to know them?   I dont' know.  i guess maybe it has something to do with the fact that i am very picky about my friends and a girlfriend would be the same way.
  Or not.  Gosh, i have to think about this some more. It's not like i make conscious decisions about these things.  It takes me a long time to get to the point of finding someone i like enough to ask out.  I have to figure out why i don't want to ask out people earlier. 

   On a different note.  You should load 'this' page and then, if you are using IE you should press F11.  Then you should be made aware that i am permanently amused by this.