Stuff On Top

Sept 27, 2000 - 9 pm

  Ok, so today i was told something that has made me think a little. Or a bit more than a little.  Or something like that.  I was told that someone thought that i worshipped someone else.  Not only did they think that i worshipped them, they knew that i worshipped them. It was not something in doubt in their mind.  I do worship this person.  This is one of the strangest things that i can think of.
   I am irreverence incarnate, i can't believe in things no matter how hard i try. I can't have faith in anything, short of certain things about my owns self.  The very concept that i am going around worshipping someone is just so incredibly laughable to me.  It means that i find someone superhuman, or infallible, or can do no wrong.  I just don't get it.  There isn't anyone who i don't mock for their failures.  Which means there isn't anyone who doesn't make failures.  I totally expect and know that everyone makes mistakes and fails. I think that if i ever found someone to be perfect, i would miss it because my attitude would rather be that they just were failing where i couldn't see.  With this in mind, how could i possibly worship anyone. Given that anyone could be doing wrong at any second, how could i worship?  
   this is why i was so amused. 
   so my next question was whether or not there was something in my actions that provided a sense of worship.  Because this is not the first time something like that had been said about a friend of mine.  And you know what it is?  The ability to accept in my friends certain imperfections, things that make them not perfect.  Accept them and not allow them to bother me.  These imperfections can be fairly large at times, seemingly huge at others.  But you know this isn't the point. the point is that i am looking at my friends and accepting that they are good people with problems. When they make mistakes, i help them to see what they have done, help them accept that it is an issue and then forgive them.  That is what being a friend is about.  Things that they do, aren't really against me they against themselves.  
   So, in my acceptance of the imperfections of my friends, i am seen to worship.  So be it.

blah.

   Oh, you wanted to know so i shall tell you.  The end of the money saga.  i went back to the store last friday and the guy asked me if i had been paid.  i said no and he promptly asked me how much it had been, i told him, he trusted me, and he paid me out of the cash register. Looking embarassed the whole time.  He then told me that the manager had lost the papers that i had given them that showed that it was their fault.   
   Ah well, so be it.  I have already forgiven them. 

   I am buying a laptop next week. which means that next month while i am in ontario, i won't be offline.  this is a good thing. whee.

bed now. night